Ninja car crimes on the rise

An Apple store in North Carolina is the latest to be attacked by a ninja in a car-related incident.
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According to a Fox 8 report, police were called to the Greensboro Apple store early on Friday morning after a ninja (or potentially just a man dressed in a ninja costume) drove his grey Honda Accord through the store’s plate glass window.

Surprisingly, the ninja didn’t steal anything from the store, leaving the so-called ‘experts’ scratching their heads. He simply made a mess of the shop front and escaped without a trace into the darkness of morning, as good ninjas do.

A security guard in the store was the only person to see the ninja, and clearly the ninja wanted to be spotted, because we all know if a ninja wanted to go completely unseen he would have no trouble eluding the sight of a mere mortal.

The report follows another attack in April, where a sword-wielding ninja (reportedly drunk, but probably just high on his mad ninja skills), slayed 11 cars in a car park in Pittsburgh.

One of the parked cars still had a passenger sitting inside it. According to WTAE in Pittsburgh, Santino Guzzo unsuccessfully tried to stop the ninja.

“He says, 'I have a sword.' That's when I said, 'I have a gun', and he tried to stab me through my car window,” Mr Guzzo said.

Unsurprisingly, the ninja disappeared without a trace, but not before smashing the car’s rear windscreen.

Police are yet to catch either ninja.

Both US news sources believe car-related ninja crimes are on the rise. Police and scientists are yet to fully understand the relationship between ninjas and cars, but rest assured, we will keep you updated on this developing stealthy story.